


a man affront to all men

by brucewaynery



Series: iron man bingo fills [18]
Category: Marvel
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Ambiguous/Open Ending, Car Sex, Friends With Benefits, M/M, Non-Explicit Sex, Steve Rogers is Not a Virgin, Strangers to Lovers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-16
Updated: 2019-08-16
Packaged: 2020-09-02 03:09:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,266
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20269030
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brucewaynery/pseuds/brucewaynery
Summary: Two strangers share a car from Boston to Brooklyn and the four-hour drive takes two days, because they get distracted. By blowjobs.or, a bastardised 'when harry met sally' au





	a man affront to all men

“Steve, this is Tony, Tony, Steve, try to New York in one piece, yeah?” Natasha perfunctorily introduces them, as Steve puts his suitcase in the back of Tony’s car. They shake hands.

Natasha never told him that her friend is hot, he has this whole ‘clean-cut’ boy look going on, blond hair, blue eyes and the shoulder-to-waist proportions of a dorito, but the way he tracks his eyes up and down Tony’s body says something else entirely.

“It’s nice to meet you, Tony,” he says, holding his hand longer than probably needed before he drops it. Tony will not blush goddamnit.

Natasha looks between them and rolls her eyes, before saying goodbye and going back to Clint.

“I’ll take the first 2 hours, we can take a pit stop, then you do the rest?” Steve offers, leaning against Tony’s car with his arms crossed like it’s the most natural thing in the world. Tony almost feels sorry for the straining seems on his shirt.

“Sounds good,” Tony says, tossing him the keys and walking over to the passenger seat. He catches the keys one-handed and grins, swinging open the door and climbing in.

They’re driving from Massachusetts to Brooklyn for Steve and then Tony’s going on to Manhattan, Natasha set them up, both of them are fresh out of college, Tony ready to take over the company, with three PhDs and enough notches on his bedpost to make the thing fall down, and Natasha told him that Steve majored in art. 

“So,” Steve starts as they pull out from the curb, “wanna play 20 questions?”

Tony gives him a look, shuffling around to prop his legs up on the dashboard. And if he knew precisely which pose makes his legs look downright R-rated, and if he does it right now then the only people who know that is Tony himself and Steve, if he notices.

“Sure,” Tony says.

The car jerks a little when Steve looks over at him, so Tony’s pretty sure that he noticed.

“Sexuality?” Tony asks, shameless.

Steve laughs and says, just as shameless, “Cute engineers.”

Tony grins and runs a hand through his hair then tucks his arm behind his head. “Oh, really, mine’s cute artists, what a coincidence.”

Steve gave him a dark, heated look, “I’m gonna pull over and suck you off, so if you have any objections, speak now.”

The blood rush from his head to his dick almost makes him dizzy. Steve pulls over into a hard-shoulder - thank god it’s late, Tony can’t handle another public indecency charge.

Steve twists himself, all graceful strength, turns out he’s far more flexible than he looks, and cups the back of Tony’s neck, pulling him into a kiss that’s all rough passion and heat. He breaks away to leave kisses down Tony’s throat that leave him gasping and moaning.

“I want you to know-- _fuck_ \--that usually I wait until at least the tenth minute upon meeting,” Tony groans out.

Steve stops what he’s doing, the pressure on his crotch disappears, as do the lips on his neck, “Do you want me to wait another five minutes for your reputation?”

“_Fuck no_.”

Tony’s relatively sure that if he waits another five minutes, he’s going to die of blue balls. 

Steve, thankfully, doesn’t wait.

“I am so… doing that… to you,” Tony pants, blearily, eyes closed. 

Half his brain has just been sucked straight out of his dick, so forgive him if he’s not entirely there yet. The rest of his brain bluescreens when he actually opens his eyes and sees Steve; his lips are a swollen cherry-red, slick with spit and Tony’s come, his hair is a veritable mess from Tony’s hands and he looks entirely wrecked. If Tony hadn’t just had the most intense blowjob of his life, he would be hard again, just from the sight of him, and the newly acquired information of what that mouth, that _tongue_ can do.

Steve thinks for a minute. “I still have a week left on my student accommodation, wanna go back?”

“What, can’t handle another hour?” Tony teases.

“Tony,” Steve says, looking straight at him with blown-out pupils, “if I drive for longer than five minutes right now, we’re going to crash.”

“Let’s go back,” Tony replies, grinning. He really, really wants his dick in him.

The second they get into Steve’s apartment, Tony’s being shoved against the wall, bracketed by Steve’s arms with his body pressing against his.

“You drive like a madman when you’re horny,” Tony tells Steve, in between kisses.

Steve groans and drops his head into the crook of his neck, “Next time I’ll go half the speed limit and stop at yellow lights.” He flits his fingers under Tony’s shirt, intent clear.

“I was stating a fact,” Tony says, far breathier than he wants to admit, “don’t want you to change.”

When Steve’s hands work their way up Tony’s torso high enough to brush his thumbs over his nipples, all thoughts of Massachusetts Road Safety and Law fly out of his mind.

-

“Hey, how’s New York?” Natasha asks, over the phone. It’s early morning, the call woke Tony up from a peaceful slumber in Steve’s arms. 

“We, uh, never made it out of Boston.”

“Goddamnit, Tony.”

-

The second time they attempt the drive, the next morning, they get halfway before Tony drags Steve into the restrooms when they stop at a service station and drops to his knees.

“Told you I’d do that,” Tony says grinning, before he’s pulled into a kiss and Steve’s hand is making its way into his pants and he comes just like that.

They manage to finish the drive, mostly, when they get to Brooklyn, all it takes is for Steve to send him a look and he’s following him into a highrise and staying the night.

-

“We can’t be together.”

“Good morning to you too?” 

Steve looks unfairly good for the hour. And confused just makes him look adorable. Which just isn’t fair.

“I live in Manhattan,” Tony barrels on, “you live in Brooklyn, you have things, and I have things.”

“That’s generally how life works, glad you’re catching up,” Steve says, no less confused, but amused. He moves so he’s sitting up, mirroring Tony. They really shouldn’t be having this conversation when he’s shirtless.

Tony lets out a frustrated noise that he didn’t know he could make. “No, just, look, I like you, you’re cute and very very good at sex, those are things I appreciate.”

“Well,” Steve starts, grinning, “Buck always did say I could turn to prostitution if art fell through.”

Tony absolutely does not get jealous over the thought of Steve having sex with other people. He doesn’t. He just thinks that he could treat the guy better than some lonely bugger on the street.

“Long-distance isn’t something I do,” Tony says, focussing on the matter at hand, and not Steve-the-prostitute.

“Okay. Do you do intermittent relationships?” Steve asks, genuinely curious.

“I think that’s the most lawyer way I’ve heard someone describe friends-with-benefits.”

Steve shrugs. The movement draws Tony’s attention to his shoulder muscles, which Tony didn’t even know he had a thing for, until him. “Intermittent relationship sounds better, whenever I’m in Manhattan, you’re in Brooklyn.”

Tony kisses him in agreement. And then some.

Tony ends up in Manhattan two days later than he planned, and he’s greeted by a pile of paperwork, an hour-long reprimand for the missed meetings and a new PA, but he has a new number in his phone and the beginnings of an (intermittent) relationship to make up for it.

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading!! a comment/kudo/ a [reblog of this post](https://ineffablestarkrogers.tumblr.com/post/187048702456/a-man-afront-to-all-men) is greatly appreciated <33


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